A lily grooms herself night after night to bloom at the first dawn, but a bear goes all macho and sucks honey at one go from the honeycomb. A baby bird flaps her delicate wings and attempts to fly, day after day so it could one day soar high above in the sky, but a cub’s first attempt at a roar is louder than the lawn mower’s first gear.
Why is that I have to prepare a hundred days to say ‘H-h-hello’ but one day a bastard comes and recites a giant joke with perfect pauses in the same go.
I am angry and I am sad because life’s not fair. And since life’s not fair I cheat.
I practice saying ‘hello’ 1000 times in the mirror
‘H-h-hello, hhello, h-ello,hello. Hello!’
I did it. See.
And then I practice to smile. I hide my shaky hands under the table, I gleam with pretence confidence and say ‘hello’ and a funny joke all in one go and no one is wiser. They laugh. They smile. They admire.
Today I belong in the other. Today I am the bitch who gets all her jokes and all her ‘hellos’ right. Tomorrow might be different. Tomorrow I may stutter. Tomorrow I may stumble and fall. But today is my day. Today is the day I rise and shine, feast on acclaim divine.
Because today I am the seductress, the queen, the pretence extrovert and none of them are wiser.
Watch ‘The Introvert’s Banter’ by Rabia Kappor one of my favourite poetry slam video. It’s amazing and delivers exactly what I want to say.